The Inferno
I admit that I'm a fan of MTV's Real World/Road Rules challenges, like "The Inferno II". I almost want to set up a sort of bracket like the NCAAs, so that you can predict who will win out in the end and win money on it, but nobody would go in on it with me. But last night, it crossed the line.
Quick premise: one member from each team has to go into this one-on-one battle to see who gets to stay in the competition and who has to be kicked off each week. To make a long story short (so unlike me!), last night, the guy who was supposed to go into the inferno (the one-on-one challenge) for one team got the lifesaver, so he had to have someone else from his team go. So this guy, who's ultra religious and friends with whacko Julie (the idiot Mormon who was racist, then blonde, then somebody who went to cut the safety cord on an opponent's skydiving-type equipment... nice touch, Jules), Jon, he volunteers to sacrifice himself. (Get the meaning there?) So anyhow, he goes into the inferno and loses and goes home. And what happens?
Julie cries. She has a two-minute wail session in front of the cameras, saying that the rest of her team is a bunch of losers who have no idea about the good in life, and they will never understand that his sacrifice "meant so much more than just the inferno." Yeah. And she's dead serious. Like, she truly believes that this guy has made some huge sacrifice for the greater good and that he sacrificed himself so that her entire team can be... what? saved? Who knows. The point is, she's a moron. Seriously, Julie. It doesn't work like that. See, you're on a REALITY TELEVISION SHOW. Jesus? He wasn't. Also, Julie, the set with all the fire and dirt? MTV paid someone a few thousand bucks for it. You're not really in danger of going to hell when you're watching the inferno battle. Nobody's soul is up for grabs. Their self-respect, yes. Soul? No. I'm not sure that she gets that walking on stilts and juicing grapefruits in your mouth isn't really the type of trials that Christ endured - and I'm not even Christian, and I get that. The thing with Julie is, she went to this Mormon university in Utah, which got pretty upset at her when she lived in a house with guys when she was first on the Real World (with UNBELIEVABLY hot guy Jamie) and they kicked her out for a semester. I never got that, because that was the best publicity for the school ever. Still, she got the boot. Then she went back, and if you ask me, she's been embarrassing the place ever since. How would you like it if your school boasted its most famous graduate was Julie, the girl on the Real World, who can't get a steady job and who has to go on these ridiculous missions every other month to pay her bills and give her self worth? And when she's in danger of losing, she tries to undo her opponent's safety harness! Oh, and, she thinks Jesus is this Southern country-singer wannabe who wears a cowboy hat and who has to endure a chicken fight-to-the-reality-show-death. Nice job, BYU. Great graduate.
Also, when Jon left, one of his teammates said, "Pray for us, Jon." Pray for you for what? I would hope for them to get real jobs so they can stop parading themselves around on nice islands and having cat fights... but... you know, no, I like the show too much. So I hope they weren't praying for that. And I don't think I have to worry, because I bet they were just praying for them to do well in a competition. That's not narcissistic or anything. Soldiers in Iraq? People with terminal illness? Those tsunami victims? Your family? Nah. Pray for them, Jon, so that they can win an inferno. After all, according to Julie, you ARE Jesus! These people absolutely kill me.
And last, if you haven't watched it, you should. Just to see Mike, who's nicknamed himself "The Miz," (Seriously, can these people get funnier?), talk about going into the inferno and kicking poor Dan's ass. Seriously. This Dan guy goes out there and is like, "yeah, I guess I can go after Mike. It's a worthy fight." And Mike? I mean, The Miz? He starts screaming into the camera, "Dan! Do you KNOW who I am? Do you KNOW how many people I've sent home?!!" And he just goes nuts.
It's the best half hour on tv. Next week, Robin does a cheer that says that Tonya is a slut and then Tonya throws someone's clothes in the pool. Cannot wait.
(Mondays, 10 PM, MTV. Check it out.)
Quick premise: one member from each team has to go into this one-on-one battle to see who gets to stay in the competition and who has to be kicked off each week. To make a long story short (so unlike me!), last night, the guy who was supposed to go into the inferno (the one-on-one challenge) for one team got the lifesaver, so he had to have someone else from his team go. So this guy, who's ultra religious and friends with whacko Julie (the idiot Mormon who was racist, then blonde, then somebody who went to cut the safety cord on an opponent's skydiving-type equipment... nice touch, Jules), Jon, he volunteers to sacrifice himself. (Get the meaning there?) So anyhow, he goes into the inferno and loses and goes home. And what happens?
Julie cries. She has a two-minute wail session in front of the cameras, saying that the rest of her team is a bunch of losers who have no idea about the good in life, and they will never understand that his sacrifice "meant so much more than just the inferno." Yeah. And she's dead serious. Like, she truly believes that this guy has made some huge sacrifice for the greater good and that he sacrificed himself so that her entire team can be... what? saved? Who knows. The point is, she's a moron. Seriously, Julie. It doesn't work like that. See, you're on a REALITY TELEVISION SHOW. Jesus? He wasn't. Also, Julie, the set with all the fire and dirt? MTV paid someone a few thousand bucks for it. You're not really in danger of going to hell when you're watching the inferno battle. Nobody's soul is up for grabs. Their self-respect, yes. Soul? No. I'm not sure that she gets that walking on stilts and juicing grapefruits in your mouth isn't really the type of trials that Christ endured - and I'm not even Christian, and I get that. The thing with Julie is, she went to this Mormon university in Utah, which got pretty upset at her when she lived in a house with guys when she was first on the Real World (with UNBELIEVABLY hot guy Jamie) and they kicked her out for a semester. I never got that, because that was the best publicity for the school ever. Still, she got the boot. Then she went back, and if you ask me, she's been embarrassing the place ever since. How would you like it if your school boasted its most famous graduate was Julie, the girl on the Real World, who can't get a steady job and who has to go on these ridiculous missions every other month to pay her bills and give her self worth? And when she's in danger of losing, she tries to undo her opponent's safety harness! Oh, and, she thinks Jesus is this Southern country-singer wannabe who wears a cowboy hat and who has to endure a chicken fight-to-the-reality-show-death. Nice job, BYU. Great graduate.
Also, when Jon left, one of his teammates said, "Pray for us, Jon." Pray for you for what? I would hope for them to get real jobs so they can stop parading themselves around on nice islands and having cat fights... but... you know, no, I like the show too much. So I hope they weren't praying for that. And I don't think I have to worry, because I bet they were just praying for them to do well in a competition. That's not narcissistic or anything. Soldiers in Iraq? People with terminal illness? Those tsunami victims? Your family? Nah. Pray for them, Jon, so that they can win an inferno. After all, according to Julie, you ARE Jesus! These people absolutely kill me.
And last, if you haven't watched it, you should. Just to see Mike, who's nicknamed himself "The Miz," (Seriously, can these people get funnier?), talk about going into the inferno and kicking poor Dan's ass. Seriously. This Dan guy goes out there and is like, "yeah, I guess I can go after Mike. It's a worthy fight." And Mike? I mean, The Miz? He starts screaming into the camera, "Dan! Do you KNOW who I am? Do you KNOW how many people I've sent home?!!" And he just goes nuts.
It's the best half hour on tv. Next week, Robin does a cheer that says that Tonya is a slut and then Tonya throws someone's clothes in the pool. Cannot wait.
(Mondays, 10 PM, MTV. Check it out.)
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