Thursday, July 21, 2005

The Sox Shirts

I first wanted a Brian Daubach shirt. I was set on having a Daubach shirt because I loved Dauber, and so when I went to Fenway and found out that they didn't make Daubach shirts because he wasn't in the union, I was crushed. This was back in, like, 2000. I did the next best thing and bought a Trot Nixon shirt, because I liked Nixon second best, but mainly because he and Daub were best friends, so I figured if I couldn't support Daubach, I'd support Nixon and then be like, "Well, Dauber would want it this way." Totally insane, yes, but that was what I was thinking at the time. (And, if I'm honest, it's still what I think.)

The Nixon shirt has become the clutch shirt. It's the go-to shirt in times of dire straits. First, it's the most worn shirt because it's the oldest. It's got tiny holes in some places, but you really can't tell, so I wear it anyway. I wore it back in 2003, when the Sox were playing the Yankees in the ALCS. It was Game 6, and Pettite was on the mound, so naturally I was nervous about the Sox winning. I pulled out the Nixon shirt. They won. Total clutch. Now, any time there's a big game? Nixon. When the Sox needed to win Games 5, 6, and 7 of the ALCS in 2004? Nixon. Game 4 of the World Series? Nixon. Big test in school? Nixon.

You might wonder why I didn't wear my Nixon shirt for Game 4 of the ALCS, another must-win game. I had the same question when I was choosing my shirt last October. I was all set to put it on when I saw my Derek Lowe shirt peeking out from my closet. I bought the Derek Lowe shirt in October 2003, after the Sox won the ALDS. It was on the day of Game 7 of the ALCS and my friend Andy convinced me to skip class to go to the souvenir store to get Todd Walker shirts because we both loved Todd Walker. When we got there, Walker was sold out. Totally depressing. But I bought the Derek Lowe shirt instead. I had been meaning to get the Derek Lowe shirt since his win in Game 5 of the ALDS, when Oakland had two men on and like nobody out in the bottom of the ninth with the Sox ahead by one run. Totally frightening, and Derek Lowe's pitching performance in that game - with the final strikeout, no less! - convinced me that no matter what happened with Derek Lowe in the future, I could always wear the shirt with pride because of that performance. That one inning earned Derek Lowe the shirt.

Anyway, on the day of Game 4 of the ALCS, I was nervous and all, but we had Derek Lowe going. And I realized, this was the perfect day to show my support for Derek Lowe. So I went with it. I didn't stick with it, because I was loyal to my Nixon clutch shirt, but I still really like my Lowe shirt. With his performance in the post season - seriously, the winning pitcher for the deciding ALDS, ALCS, and World Series games - makes it, like, insanely obvious and logical that this shirt will forever be a must-keep. No matter how many teams he ends up on or how many times he has a psychotic breakdown on the mound. Those four performances in the 2003 and 2004 postseason have made him a part of the t-shirt pantheon. Forever. Amen.

In between the Nixon shirt and the Lowe shirt, I bought a few others. Back before I came to Boston, when I bought my shirts at Bob's, I actually bought a Carl Everett shirt. No idea why. I think I liked the controversy in owning a Carl Everett shirt. Who in their right mind would walk around in one of those? This is the guy who was known as "Jurassic Carl" because he claimed dinosaurs didn't exist and he would beat up anybody - ANYBODY - who said otherwise or accused him of crowding the plate (which he did, at every single at-bat, by using his cleat to rub out the batter's box chalk line). Anyway, I wore this shirt for a while and then I deemed it ridiculous so I wore it to this painting event and got paint all over it. I threw it away the next day.

I also had a gray Ramirez shirt that was so gigantic I wore it to sleep in. I still have it, somewhere, but I'm not sure where. I wore it a lot in London.

Back in 2001, I was adamant that the one off-season move the Red Sox had to make was to acquire Johnny Damon. When they did, I was ecstatic and I bought a Damon shirt immediately. Due to recent off-the-field antics, I have put that shirt on probation and I wear it only to the gym. With his on-the-field statistics, I can still justify the shirt, and I can always justify him as a key Sox player (huge homeruns in Game 7 of the ALCS last year). Still, it's not my favorite anymore. Plus, just about every bandwagon fan around has the shirt because they all think he's the "face of the Red Sox." Umm, no.

Last year, before the trade obviously, I bought the ghetto "Boston/Nomah 5" shirt from the people outside Fenway. I wore it twice before he got traded. I still have it, and I might pull it out sometime. I feel like I can now because the guy's career is basically trashed. Now, instead of being thought of as one of the greatest players in Boston history, he's forever attached to "The Trade that Made the World Series Win Possible." That must be very depressing. People everywhere are like, "If they don't trade Nomar, they don't win the Series." Yikes. Plus, now he's injured (again) in a contract year. The guy turned down $60 million over four years a few years back, making that the biggest mistake in contract negotiaton history (if you don't count Alex Rodriguez himself). So now, out of almost pity, I would wear the shirt. It's like saying, Nomar, back when you were Nomah, we loved you. Sorry pal.

Last year was also the year that they came out with Brian Daubach shirts. This was my full-circle moment T-shirt wise. Oprah the Great talks about full-circle moments on her show, these moments when something in your life becomes complete or something like that. I felt like my initial search had finally ended. I was ridiculously excited buying the Daubach shirt last spring. I bet people were like, "What is WRONG with her?" when I was practically glowing when I asked for it. I still wear it, obviously, and I always, always will. I don't care how many comments I get from co-workers who wonder how I can wear it around with pride. He's my all-time favorite player, even if I have no solid stats to back up my position. I don't care. And the thing I love is that when I wear it, I always see tons of other people wearing Daubach shirts, too. The guy has a cult following, I'm telling you. People loved him.

This year, I bought a Millar shirt. I like Millar, because of the same reason I liked the Dauber: here's a guy who likes his job. He loves playing for Boston. He's a nice guy. A hard-worker. Granted, recently Millar's been saying a lot to the media that's been a little out of sorts, but I can't help but feel the guy's situation as possible odd-man-out. I wanted to get the shirt before it was unavailable, let me put it that way. I like his attitude, even if it is altered with part Jack Daniels, part out-of-control.

I have tons of other random shirts: Posada is a Little Bitch (a special gift, but I have yet to wear it outside), Sox girls have more fun (the only decidely girly piece of Sox clothing I own), Reverse the Curse (happily retired), Yankees Choked (fabulous), plus some regular "Boston Red Sox" plain shirts. I own two sweatshirts, one zip-up sweatshirt, and one fleece. Some people have fewer clothes in their entire closet. It's extreme, I admit it.

A few days ago, I went to the souvenir store with some friends. For my birthday party, everyone's going to watch the Sox game, so I said that the dress code was Red Sox shirts. I didn't expect people to take it seriously, but people did. The Souvenir Store should send me a thank you note, or at least commission, because of all the business tossed their way this week. So my two friends each bought a t-shirt, and then, I couldn't help it. I figured, it's my birthday. I should buy a shirt to commemorate the occasion.

Timlin's the newest addition to my t-shirt roster. I bought his shirt because I like Timlin a lot, but mostly because I feel like he should have been an all-star. So if he can't be an all-star, I'll buy his shirt and show my support that way. It's totally ridiculous reasoning, but it's what it is.

Last night, my friend Allison, who had gone to the store with me a few days ago and had just bought a Sox shirt (classic, no name on the back) told me she wanted to buy a player shirt now. "I think it's only right," she said, sounding disturbingly like me (well, minus the Southern accent). "I mean, I should have a player shirt. The thing is, I want to get your opinion. I only know a few players, but I want to know, should I get Johnny Damon?"

I laughed and gave her my own reasoning about my Damon t-shirt. In the end, she decided on getting a David Ortiz shirt, I think. (Oh, right, I have an Ortiz shirt as well. This story is decidely less cool. I went back to the souvenir store to bait this guy to ask for my phone number. Sad, yes. I ended up with both. I don't wear the shirt that much, because almost everyone in Boston has one, and I don't really think the trip back was really that worth it.) Anyway, the point is, I'm becoming known in my circle of friends for giving advice on which Red Sox t-shirt to buy.

The thing is, it's hit or miss. Take Orlando Cabrera and Doug Mientkiewicz, for example. A Cabrera shirt is now solid. Nobody will ever hate Orlando Cabrera because he was with the Sox when they won, and he made up all these secret handshakes. Everyone loves him. Mientkiewicz? I would burn a Mientkiewicz shirt after the whole World Series ball fiasco. So you never know.

The bottom line is to have your own screwed up reasoning about why you buy a shirt. That way, no matter what, you can always have your own story attached to it. For Allison, maybe her story will be that she came to Boston to see what the whole Red Sox thing was about, and by the end, she had gotten into it enough to know a few players' names, so she bought a shirt (a little piece of Boston and the Red Sox, if you will) to take with her to California. That's how I like to think of it, anyway.