The First Guest: The Foley Email
I recently wrote an email to my friends and asked them two questions: If Pinocchio said, "My nose is about to grow," what would happen? And second, if you try to fail, but succeed, which have you done?
Here is what my good friend Elizabeth Foley wrote back:
Monday, December 13, 2004 at 12:55 AM
SHIT. FUCK. COCK. BALLS. it's 12:45 am. the eve of finals week. i'm uneasy. a little nervous. i don't know what to do.
every now and then we come across obstacles in our lives. seemingly insurrmountable obstacles. we find ourselves with questions. questions that we do not know the answers to. its reminiscent of those clips on sesame street when there is a person walking down a hallway with many doors. it's impossibleto know what rewards or terrors are awaiting us on the other side of the door. but still we must choose. and so are the questions we will face this week. we will take tests, quite possibly not knowing the answers to the questions on these tests. but still we must choose our answers, and pray to the higher power (god, or yahweh to our jewish friends) that these answers are right. the consequences of being wrong could be quite damaging. no one wants to be that ass who gets the answers wrong. and so are the questions elana has posed for us this evening.
but still, an answer must be attempted. and so, friends, a venture out in to that vast desert of the unknown, and i attempt an answer. what will happen if pinocchio says "my nose is about to grow"? it is my contention that his nose would grow. if it wasn't otherwise about to grow, the process would have been catalyzed by his dishonesty in this announcement. if it were otherwise about to grow, it would continue to do so. pinnochio never faced consequences for telling the truth, nor did his nose shrink as a result of his honesty. i believe there is no other option in the matter. the boy's nose would grow.
wheh. one down. still a little nervous. but i press on.
if you try to fail, but succeed, what have you done? well elana, i believe the err is in the wording of your question. do you mean succeed to fail, or succeed to do right. for example, if you are presented the mathematical equation 2+2=x and, trying to fail, you answer x=22. you have failed to answer the problem correctly, but succeeded in failing. however, if you answer x=4, you have succeeded in answering the problem correctly, but failed in your mission to fail. you see this question can not be answered, because the question itself can be interpreted in a variety of ways.
ok. i have done my best. i've given it all i've got. if swarms of locusts, or a great flood wipe out the population tomorrow because humans have failed todo right by god (or yahweh to our jewish friends), tell them "i did my best" cause really that's all anyone can do.
best,
alvaro tobar
Here is what my good friend Elizabeth Foley wrote back:
Monday, December 13, 2004 at 12:55 AM
SHIT. FUCK. COCK. BALLS. it's 12:45 am. the eve of finals week. i'm uneasy. a little nervous. i don't know what to do.
every now and then we come across obstacles in our lives. seemingly insurrmountable obstacles. we find ourselves with questions. questions that we do not know the answers to. its reminiscent of those clips on sesame street when there is a person walking down a hallway with many doors. it's impossibleto know what rewards or terrors are awaiting us on the other side of the door. but still we must choose. and so are the questions we will face this week. we will take tests, quite possibly not knowing the answers to the questions on these tests. but still we must choose our answers, and pray to the higher power (god, or yahweh to our jewish friends) that these answers are right. the consequences of being wrong could be quite damaging. no one wants to be that ass who gets the answers wrong. and so are the questions elana has posed for us this evening.
but still, an answer must be attempted. and so, friends, a venture out in to that vast desert of the unknown, and i attempt an answer. what will happen if pinocchio says "my nose is about to grow"? it is my contention that his nose would grow. if it wasn't otherwise about to grow, the process would have been catalyzed by his dishonesty in this announcement. if it were otherwise about to grow, it would continue to do so. pinnochio never faced consequences for telling the truth, nor did his nose shrink as a result of his honesty. i believe there is no other option in the matter. the boy's nose would grow.
wheh. one down. still a little nervous. but i press on.
if you try to fail, but succeed, what have you done? well elana, i believe the err is in the wording of your question. do you mean succeed to fail, or succeed to do right. for example, if you are presented the mathematical equation 2+2=x and, trying to fail, you answer x=22. you have failed to answer the problem correctly, but succeeded in failing. however, if you answer x=4, you have succeeded in answering the problem correctly, but failed in your mission to fail. you see this question can not be answered, because the question itself can be interpreted in a variety of ways.
ok. i have done my best. i've given it all i've got. if swarms of locusts, or a great flood wipe out the population tomorrow because humans have failed todo right by god (or yahweh to our jewish friends), tell them "i did my best" cause really that's all anyone can do.
best,
alvaro tobar
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