The Roomus Final Exam 2004
I've been noticing how much everyone is getting hyped up over their upcoming exams. Everyone is running around trying to read whatever books they didn't this past semester, or learn all these concepts about the political systems of some ancient African tribe, or they're trying to memorize the sixteen stages of life for the Australian turtle dove. It hit me, as I was walking in back of a group of BU kids talking about their stress over exams, that nobody is really testing what they should be. Nobody's checking to make sure that people are learning the important information, and therefore, I have a deep fear that nobody's really learning the actual stuff that they can use in life, to benefit themselves and others and, of course, me. So I've decided to make my own final exam. If I ruled the world, or umm, just BU, or even just a class (the realm of power is getting smaller and smaller) then this would be my final exam.
Good luck.
This final exam is composed of multiple choice, true/false, and essay questions.
1. When exiting a building, which door should you use?
A. Whichever door I want. I am the most important person exiting the building; therefore, it is only obvious that others should acquiesce to my whims and wait for me to exit or try to squeeze by me as I make my ceremonious departure.
B. Whichever door someone has held open for me, just enough so that I can squeeeeeeze through and not touch it to hold it for the next person. Sucker!
C. The door that other people are trying to come through. I mean, why make life easy for them?!
D. The door on the right-side. I'm one of the two people in the world that understand this concept.
2. True or False: It is okay to be waiting in a long line at a to-go restaurant and to get to the front of the line only to ask, "Which sandwich has turkey and roast beef but no tuna?" and to proceed to debate the merits of honey mustard vs. spicy mustard with your dining companions, the person taking the order, and the fifty people in back of you who want to murder you at that moment.
3. Short Answer: While walking down the street, if you see someone approaching in the opposite direction, right in your pathway, what is the best way to avoid a collision?
4. True or False: The best place to have a group debate about whether you should eat at Noodle Street or Nud Pob is right in the middle of the street at the corner, right where general traffic converges from about five different streets.
5. In a non-smoking building, where is it proper to have a cigarette?
A. Anywhere I want. I'm tired of all these health nuts who want to breathe clean air. Clean air is overrated.
B. Right outside the entrance, so that everyone who walks in and out of the building can breathe the smoke before the enter or right after they exit.
C. In the doorway. How am I supposed to stand outside and get the thing lit if it's windy? More importantly, my hair will get really messed up if I'm outside too long.
D. Nowhere. Then again, I only know this answer because I don't smoke.
6. In class, when I have a comment to share, I should:
A. Shout it out and talk as long as I want. I don't need to wait for someone to call on me. My opinion matters most - on every subject, even those I have no real idea about.
B. Mutter it, so that only the professor and I can hear. Nobody else is important; my class doesn't need to be in the private conversation between the professor and me, obviously the brightest student in the class.
C. Tell the person next to me, in a loud whisper, so that my neighbor can know how smart I am, and so that he - and everyone around us - cannot hear the teacher to copy notes down, but I won't actually raise my hand because I'm too afraid that I'll get the answer wrong.
D. Don't say anything, because let's face it, is my comment really that worthwhile to the class? Will it really change anybody's life to hear my comment? No.
7. Which of the following is proper behavior at the close of class? (i.e. the minute class ends - 12:50, for example, or 3:20)
A. Ask an in-depth question. This stuff is so fascinating, everyone will want to stick around to hear the professor talk more about the concept that caused them to fight off sleep for the past half hour!
B. Make this the time you finally contribute to the class discussion by listing all of your feelings about every chapter of every book we've covered in class thus far.
C. Ask the professor if he's really sure that there's no class next Friday, and is he positive that he only wants the class to complete the even problems, not the odds as well?
D. Silently seethe as your stupid classmates perform choices A, B, and C, and your professor remains clueless to the ticking clock.
8. True or False: Cutting the sandwich line is okay as long as you only want to get a slice of cheese. And some turkey. Oh, and can you just add one scoop of tuna? And some pickles real quick? Thanks!
9. Short Answer. Describe a situation when it is okay to save an elevator for someone. Your answer should include words such as, "emergency," "blood," "unconscious," and "death."
10. True or False: Uggs are a fashionable form of footwear and can be worn with skirts or jeans, but look especially hot with skin-tight leggings tucked into them.
Pass it in.
Good luck.
This final exam is composed of multiple choice, true/false, and essay questions.
1. When exiting a building, which door should you use?
A. Whichever door I want. I am the most important person exiting the building; therefore, it is only obvious that others should acquiesce to my whims and wait for me to exit or try to squeeze by me as I make my ceremonious departure.
B. Whichever door someone has held open for me, just enough so that I can squeeeeeeze through and not touch it to hold it for the next person. Sucker!
C. The door that other people are trying to come through. I mean, why make life easy for them?!
D. The door on the right-side. I'm one of the two people in the world that understand this concept.
2. True or False: It is okay to be waiting in a long line at a to-go restaurant and to get to the front of the line only to ask, "Which sandwich has turkey and roast beef but no tuna?" and to proceed to debate the merits of honey mustard vs. spicy mustard with your dining companions, the person taking the order, and the fifty people in back of you who want to murder you at that moment.
3. Short Answer: While walking down the street, if you see someone approaching in the opposite direction, right in your pathway, what is the best way to avoid a collision?
4. True or False: The best place to have a group debate about whether you should eat at Noodle Street or Nud Pob is right in the middle of the street at the corner, right where general traffic converges from about five different streets.
5. In a non-smoking building, where is it proper to have a cigarette?
A. Anywhere I want. I'm tired of all these health nuts who want to breathe clean air. Clean air is overrated.
B. Right outside the entrance, so that everyone who walks in and out of the building can breathe the smoke before the enter or right after they exit.
C. In the doorway. How am I supposed to stand outside and get the thing lit if it's windy? More importantly, my hair will get really messed up if I'm outside too long.
D. Nowhere. Then again, I only know this answer because I don't smoke.
6. In class, when I have a comment to share, I should:
A. Shout it out and talk as long as I want. I don't need to wait for someone to call on me. My opinion matters most - on every subject, even those I have no real idea about.
B. Mutter it, so that only the professor and I can hear. Nobody else is important; my class doesn't need to be in the private conversation between the professor and me, obviously the brightest student in the class.
C. Tell the person next to me, in a loud whisper, so that my neighbor can know how smart I am, and so that he - and everyone around us - cannot hear the teacher to copy notes down, but I won't actually raise my hand because I'm too afraid that I'll get the answer wrong.
D. Don't say anything, because let's face it, is my comment really that worthwhile to the class? Will it really change anybody's life to hear my comment? No.
7. Which of the following is proper behavior at the close of class? (i.e. the minute class ends - 12:50, for example, or 3:20)
A. Ask an in-depth question. This stuff is so fascinating, everyone will want to stick around to hear the professor talk more about the concept that caused them to fight off sleep for the past half hour!
B. Make this the time you finally contribute to the class discussion by listing all of your feelings about every chapter of every book we've covered in class thus far.
C. Ask the professor if he's really sure that there's no class next Friday, and is he positive that he only wants the class to complete the even problems, not the odds as well?
D. Silently seethe as your stupid classmates perform choices A, B, and C, and your professor remains clueless to the ticking clock.
8. True or False: Cutting the sandwich line is okay as long as you only want to get a slice of cheese. And some turkey. Oh, and can you just add one scoop of tuna? And some pickles real quick? Thanks!
9. Short Answer. Describe a situation when it is okay to save an elevator for someone. Your answer should include words such as, "emergency," "blood," "unconscious," and "death."
10. True or False: Uggs are a fashionable form of footwear and can be worn with skirts or jeans, but look especially hot with skin-tight leggings tucked into them.
Pass it in.
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